Returning to sunshine and trust in intuition

Posting on consecutive days? That’s become rare on this blog by now. It’s been a while but I spontaneously decided to join Meg’s marvelous Monday parade again. Because while things overall are still not all sunshine and rainbows, there were many good ones in between. This is a very spontaneous post [meaning: hopeully not too many typos], written late at night after our guests had left. Trying to keep those memories afresh rather than letting the Sunday sadness – can any of you relate or is it just me? – sink in. Let’s get listing as our host herself would say. Here’s some of what I did/what happened in my life recently.our host

Week in review

Voted. Twice in five weeks because we’re fancy like that. Once – as mentioned here – for the Bundestag and yesterday, my county held elections for the so-called Landtag.
Baked the first batch of Christmas cookies of the season. Or, if you’re judging me for starting this early, autumn cookies. Because when is ever not a time for cookies?? I was even daring enough to try a new recipe and it got rave reviews by the family. And yes, I took pictures but knowing my laptop’s non-speed have yet to upload so will be sharing them soon. For now, a  lttle throwback to my Zimtsterne from the past year. Definitely on the baking list again.

vegane Zimtsterne - flourless vegan Christmas cookies

My favourite little munchkin [for those of you new here: my nephew P.], my sister and brother visited us for the weekend and we had a truly amazing time wth the golden October sun paid us a much welcome visit. Living further away, my brother doesn’t get to stay around frequently and seeing my sister and P. obviously is wonderful time and time again, too.

As I’ve mentioned, I haven’t been feeling too cheerful lately and seeing them warmed my heart, really filling those happiness batteries. Remember the surplus of happiness-inducing moments in yesterday’s post?  The whole weekend – minus a few blurbs – was just that.

Made an effort to eat intuitively this weekend. Now some of you might be surprised, wondering if I wasn’t already doing that all the time. The sad answer is: no and I had  yet to truly get back to it even before this. With the decrease in self-confidence mentioned recently, I fell back into old unhealthy eating patterns. If you have or are struggling with an ED, you’ll know how hard they are to escape from. How easily they can lure you back in when life gets unstable and scary. I’m not proud to write this but have started taking steps to get better. Trusting my intuition was uncomfortable but worth it for more enjoyable meal and family times. Saturday was easier than Sunday when – clearly showing me its appreciation for tuning into my intuition [as if] – my stomach had me wake up insanely ravenous. Feeding that metabolism, feeding it. I’m somebody who likes plans and having things under control but that’s no way to eat live.

It’s an example used time and time again but true: P. modeled intuitive eating to a T again this weekend. In between cake after breakfast, cookies, cheese, buttered bread and a surprisingly huge amount of gnocchi at dinner, it was amazing to see him eat. Yet while us adults were surprised by how much he packed away, we also didn’t question any of his choices [why would we?]. It was obvious he knew what he needed. No outside reassurance needed, no comparison, no questions asked. Toddlers truly have a beautiful confidence of their intuition that many of us have sadly lost.

Treated myself to some Crazy Rumors lip balms, the Parlor Collection if you were curious. These had been on my radar for years upon years but I’d never been able to convince myself to make that purchase. The old saying should really be ‘lip balms are a girl’s best friend’ because I’d rather take those – and have a decent collection – than sparkly nothingness.

Rushing to finish this post because, oh hey, Monday and as such work is coming closer. The above is by no means a full recap of the past week, much less life lately in its whole but it’s a little glimpse into the important or happier parts. Because those are what we should focus on when the going gets tough.

Happy Monday!

Happiness-inducing today: Family time. A lame one, I know, but simply the truth.

Stay in touch!
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Tell me some achievements from your past week!

What was something you treated yourself to recently? Any other chapstick fans out there?

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6 thoughts on “Returning to sunshine and trust in intuition

  1. Meghan@CleanEatsFastFeets says:

    I’m so glad you had a wonderful weekend with P and the family; ya like how he comes first now? Their appetites are amazing a wonder to behold. Ave didn’t eat much food today, just some oatmeal and lots of snacks, but yesterday she packed away bowl after bowl of mac n cheese and chili.

    Kudos to you for recognizing old patterns creeping in and working to correct them. We’re all a work in progress, so make sure to cut yourself some slack.

    Good to see you back in the WIR.

  2. mylittletablespoon says:

    We all need to try and replicate toddlers way more often. I saw a little kid just take off her shirt in my restaurant the other day and I just thought… yep. You go kid. If only we could all do that whenever we wanted. But what we CAN do is remember those glorious years when all that mattered was doing what your body wanted. Being okay with it, being free, and moving on. You’re working hard love. Keep working, and keep recognizing how strong you are for doing this.

    Yay for spontaneity and getting back to the WIR! I have a feeling spontaneity is not the most natural thing to you – so YAY.

  3. Joyce @ The Hungry Caterpillar says:

    I know I’m starting to fall back into old, bad habits when I wake up in the middle of the night really hungry, too. I think it happens to most of us with some history of ED.
    That reminds me–I need to do my research for the upcoming city elections! Good for you for voting twice in one month; I don’t know if the U.S. could get its citizens to vote more than once a year. :S
    Looking forward to those cookie recipes! And amen to lip balm being a girl’s best friend.

  4. Emily Swanson says:

    I know exactly what you mean by falling into not trusting your intuition. WE’ve been on a trip to Europe this past month, and it’s been incredibly hard not to calorie count everything; and I have woken up really hungry because I know I didn’t eat enough the day before. However this was such an encouraging post and a good reminder to really get back to intuitive eating (sort of.) I still struggle with not counting the calories; I think that’s my biggest fear that I don’t want to let go. ❤

  5. Kaylee says:

    AHHH! so excited for all the Christmas baked goodies! Less than two months away now!

    Listening to your intuition is one of the trickiest things even without out an ED. I struggle with it even when it comes to non-food things. But yes, uncomfortable feelings with pass but the memories and experiences spent with family are irreplaceable.

    I treated myself to a haircut last Friday. Oooh, and did a quick face mask last night. Not something that I usually do but want to take better care of my skin (if you have any tips???)

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