Regret – it’s what you make from it

Another Monday, another fresh start with a clean slate after the past week. Time to evaluate what went well and what could use improvement which we might follow up by setting [smaller or bigger] goals to change things. And yes, Mondays are indeed a marvelous chance for reflection. Having just moved back into my apartment after several months at my parents make this a special occasion for some long-term evaluation.


Do you ever feel like running in circles completely overwhelmed but with no way out? And then it just takes somebody asking the very right questions to make you notice you’ve already known the solution or at least the root of the problem all the time? Whether or not you can relate [anybody?] it’s been just like that for me lately. long with my move – already in the days, weeks even, leading up to it – came the return of an old acquaintance. And one I didn’t welcome back with open arms: Regret.

Looking back at the past months of living at my parents’ house I suddenly felt so much regret. Regret for opportunities I didn’t take. Questions I didn’t ask. Decisions I didn’t make. In the end, though, regret is about realizations which in itself can be positive and actually help us progress in life. Regret focuses on the past and we can’t change that anymore  – however much we want to and if we like this fact or not. What we can influence, though, is the future. By choosing not to regret [as much] anymore and preventing ourselves from regret in the first place.

Saying all that my goal is to regret less and have less reasons for regret. The latter might be even harder than the former for me, admittedly, because it means taking opportunities when offered. I’m stressing the less here knowing myself and that I don’t feel able to say yes all of the time for now. Just taking invitations and stepping out of my comfort zone every now and then would be an improvement already. Focussing on a certain number of ‘challenges’ per week will only set me up for failure in the first place – and with failure comes regret. Nevertheless, I know it’ll take some pushing from the outside, too, and I think there is a number of blends out there [you know I mean you] that are more than willing to be just that encouragement :).

It’s interesting to see how my non-resolutions [unintentionally] find their way into my life and the smaller changes I’m striving for. Even though I actually didn’t look at the post again since and hadn’t thought about which tangible everyday goals I might derive from the as the year would progress back then. Maybe destiny knew and influenced my choice? Either way I feel life has its way of giving us hints on where we should head. And for now I guess that’ll mean back to the grind for most of us – though rumor has it some of you are experiencing the joy of a long weekend? – so:

Happy Monday!


Happiness inducing today: Enjoying a relaxed Sunday morning.

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Do you feel regret often?

How do you handle it? Let it get you down? Use it as a chance for change?





Quitting for happiness

Nobody likes a quitter.

That saying has been ingrained in my head ever since I first heard it. Quitting seems synonymus with giving up. Not being able to stick with things and make them work. But is it true in all cases? What about deliberately choosing to quit – for happiness?

Let me explain: As you might know I started working a full-time job/internship at the beginning of August after finishing my studies. And now – a mere four weeks into it: I quit. Before you judge, though, let you tell me I’m not usually a quitter. Not at all. So I didn’t make this a spur-of-the-moment decision. It had been quite a way coming. Yes, four weeks aren’t a long time. Only it’d been four weeks of a six-month-internship already and I’d neither gotten more interesting tasks nor felt more comfortable at the office. Not going too much into the details for privacy’s sake I’ll keep it at saying the work atmosphere wasn’t enjoyable, either.  So it all played into a decision I wouldn’t have had to make had I listened to what I truly wanted earlier on.

Maybe you’re wondering why I started the job after all if I ended up unhappy in it. Fear and my constant need for safety are the answers. Back when I applied for this internship I was in the middle of writing my thesis, unsure of what was to come and afraid of change. Most of my friends didn’t stress about applying for jobs yet and instead pondered plans of traveling the world or simply taking some time off after graduation. And as much as I’d have liked that, too, I was scared. I’m a planner. In a [at least to me] perfect world I’d have had the one exact idea of what I wanted to do with my life at the end of my studies. All laid out with a plan of how I’d spent the first years post-graduation. Only that’s not what life works like. Obviously.

Fast forward to now I had been going to work without enjoying it every day. Tried to convince myself it wasn’t that bad and would probably get better. Only it didn’t so I quit. Not without going through the pros and cons of this decision with my family about a dozen times. Something else that helped was a conversation I had with a special blend who reminded me of that we only ever get one today. So we better spend it doing what we really enjoy. Working in a job my heart wasn’t into would have neither made me happy nor would I have had a [huge] benefit from it in terms of my future career.

With a lot of time to think these past days I noticed that in a way quitting and suddenly being left without a job was a blessing in disguise. Aside from already searching a new job I’ve noticed I need to make some changes in my life to be able to live it to the fullest and happiest. To actually get up and live.

Being honest, though, I’m scared of what’s to come right now. Lots of things to be taken of, decisions to be made [and that’s not exactly one my biggest strengths] and playing the waiting game in terms of finding a new job again. Reassurance and advice on how to keep calm, trust in the process and make this a truly marvelous new start are much appreciated.

Happiness inducing today: Starting a new healthy routine.

Have you ever quit something – a job or else  – to find happiness?

Are you good at adapting to change or stick to a certain structure and routines?

And to end on a happy note: How did you spend/are you spending the [long for US and Canadian readers] weekend?